What does it mean to be “Authentic”? It’s the buzzword in many leadership and management books and talks these days. We are told that authentic leaders can connect with others better, and can effect more influence and impact within their teams, but hardly does anyone tell us how to BE authentic. Some talk about being willing to be vulnerable, being open, and being ok with showing the human side of us.
Can we be truly authentic if we haven’t spent time or effort truly connecting with and understanding ourselves? What is it like to peer deep into yourself? Sometimes it’s hard to do that on our own. And that’s when a coach comes in handy.
Recently a client used this to describe what I do – “deep coaching”. I found it an apt description. What I do in coaching is to be a mirror to clients, a mirror that helps them to peer deep into themselves.
What lies between us and our authenticity are stories that have been laden on us – stories that others have told us, society has told us and stories that we’ve accepted and told ourselves, unknowingly over years of growing up. Unconsciously we have accepted them and allowed them to shape our beliefs and values. But are they reflective of who we truly are, when we did not consciously choose which stories to take on that form our self-identity and self-image?
Deep coaching helps us to unpack and unpeel those stories. Those who do this work will find liberation and discover how these stories have limited us. And we then get to choose, what are the beliefs that serves us and discard those that don’t.
When we are free from these stories and unhelpful (often untrue) beliefs, we can arrive at our Authentic Selves. Yes the word is “arrive”. Because it takes a journey, a journey into ourselves.
